Tag Archives: Universe

Under the Influence Of…?

We are all under the influence of SOMETHING.

Back in the day, it was usually a nice red wine or a very naughty Grand Marnier.

Because my feelings were on lock-down, I had to numb them.

When I started to allow my feelings to rise to the surface (thanks to getting off of Zoloft and eliminating alcohol), those feelings made clear what was TRULY influencing me.

Good feelings? Happy thoughts? Joyful intentions and a positive outlook? That means I’m under the influence of Source/God/Spirit…however you choose to refer to the Divine.

Stressed? Anxious? Feeling insecure and inferior? Oh, I have just unplugged my connection and I am all caught up in what I can see, hear, smell, taste, and touch.

The senses are very compelling, but they are only PART of the story.

There is a meta (above) physical reality that is FAR more powerful that what my senses can discern.

It is in THAT universe where unlimited potential, lavish abundance and boatloads of  creativity and inspiration reside.

One of the most powerful realizations of this past year has been that Brenda and Source are ONE.  I don’t have to strive for a connection; it is not sever-able.

I don’t have to be good enough, or praise enough, or be holy enough to make myself attractive to God.

That’s the unconditional part of love where traditional religion goes off track.

Conservative Christianity’s view that a God that is love – and unconditional love at that – could damn a soul to “hell” always troubled me; yet I was so entrenched, it terrified me to consider otherwise.  I felt guilty reading Rob Bell’s book Love Wins, yet I couldn’t pull myself away from the sense it made.

This awakening was the first of many to follow…and just like playing whack-a-mole, as soon as I learn something new I learn there’s more to learn.

We’re all on our own, individual journeys. Some of you are further down the road than I, and maybe I’m down the pike from where you are…but the best part is it doesn’t matter.

Ha! Doesn’t it often turn out that when you think you’re ahead you’re really behind (and vice-versa?)

This isn’t a competition.  No one has the corner on the market of spirituality and everyone has a little piece of the truth.

I have found that the safest, most peaceful space to live in is where love truly wins.

In that space, everyone wins.

My closing thoughts on awakening and the new WOW, coming right up!

Well, hello possibilities!  What risks are YOU going to take this week?

(I’m rooting for you!)

xoxoxoxo

Brenda

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Let Your Heart De-Light (and the New WOW)

The carol goes, “Let your heart BE light…” but I’m flipping it to “Let your heart DE-light” in honor of our recent Word of the Week.

There’s nothing like treats in the mail (instead of bills) to delight your heart, and my cup ran over with jelly and jam joy with this package from my Aunt Joan upon my return to Sarasota:

Aunt Joan gets regular shout outs on this blog for her constant love and support.  However, she will be scolded this week for totally blowing any semblance of my diet with her amazing “What are they called?” fruity, crumbly cookies.

I ate them all.

Myself.

But the pièce de résistance of her over-the-top gift package was the silver cuff that sits atop the jams in the above photo, engraved with these words:

Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations.

How true!  I started 2017 with the intention that it would be an “annus mirabilis” or “year of miracles.”  It was all that and a bag of chips, but the road was forged with grit and tears, hopes and fears marked by bold and brave moves that surprised even myself.

When the dust settled, I marveled at the complete and utter paradigm shift that had occurred.

My life had been completely upended, purposefully.

It was HARD.  Detoxing from Zoloft, settling into a single person’s life, finding a new rhythm and learning to love me, myself and I was a journey as jungle-like as my trek to Costa Rica.

My expectation was that I’d navigate this new way of life for a few years and then, maybe, someone might come along that I’d like enough to spend time with.

The universe had other plans, and now I find myself in love with a guy who wants to sit and map out our intentions together for 2018.

If I’m dreaming, please, nobody wake me up.

That’s not to say violins are playing and I have stardust in my eyes.  Life is real and relationships are the best opportunity to put to work all the spiritual truths collected over the course of a lifetime.

Here’s the kicker:  This is a man who laughs.  Alot.

He laughs when I get all wonked out about imaginary fears.  When I spill the soup all over the counter and miss the bowl, he chuckles.  I trekked him through an entire parking garage at the airport until I realized we were in the WRONG garage.

At every turn, I’m braced for the blow; the harsh, eye-rolling, “Brenda!” tinged with exasperation.

Yet the blow never comes.

Every time I get all heavy, Mark Roach gets all LIGHT.  And not in a diminishing or condescending way.  He just thinks that life is too precious to get all riled up about insignificant stuff.

These kind responses are healing another layer of my heart so bruised from being so darned hard on myself for far too long.

If you ever struggle with giving yourself a break, my closing thoughts on delight will hopefully encourage your heart.  Plus, we have a fantastic new Word of the Week (and Word of the YEAR!):

What do you want to be?

WHO do you want to be?

What do you want to become?

Where do you want to live?

What do you want to do?

These questions that I posed extemporaneously in this week’s video are the very ones I am asking myself as I head into 2018.  I hope you will ask yourself the same and we can begin INTENTIONALLY our year of TRANSFORMATION.

Much love to you all –

Brenda

xoxoxox

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Goosebumps and the New WOW (2.28.16)

Last week’s WOW was PRESENCE, and this time around I was focusing on the fact that I’m never alone.  This realization is often accompanied by the presence of goosebumps.

Whether you call that Presence God, or the Universe, the Holy Spirit or Energy…you’ve felt it.

When you’ve been encountered by pure acceptance and love, ka-ching – that’s it!

When the sunset takes your breath away or a baby’s little hand curls around your finger…

…these are all goosebump worthy in my estimation.

This past week, did you see that clip from Undercover Boss? Where the woman (she’s so awesome) tells her new co-worker not to feel down…and to keep moving forward (then reveals that she leaves work to go to the homeless shelter where she and her three children have been living.)

I can’t do it justice, you just have to watch it. And get your tissues ready.

Sometimes in tears or the expression of true emotion, I experience the Presence. Like when Kelly Clarkson sang this week on American Idol.

When I speak or write about the Presence of God, I see a sharp drop in “likes” on Facebook. My thought is that it brings back memories or thoughts of religion that didn’t work for you and you don’t believe in anymore. I get it!

It’s also revealing that when I post a video of the Gulf of Mexico at sunset or a bunny eating a carrot with its nose wiggling, the likes go through the roof.

And it delights me. Because these, too, are a celebration of life and love and light and all that is Good.

Anything I experience that is Good, I attribute to my understanding of God.  I find such comfort in feeling that connection.

So while I will always cherish the goosebumps, it’s time for a new Word of the Week (with a few parting thoughts on the word Presence…)

For those of you at a crossroads, at a huge decision juncture, preparing to embark on a business venture or a love affair…or even if it is as small as “should I take that umbrella with me?” – may we all have heightened discernment this week.

And if you can’t yield it;  if it’s full of angst and bad energy – flush it.

That’s not the wisdom that should win your vote.

And when in doubt, don’t.

Have a wonderful week!

xoxoxox

Brenda

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A Serious Nudge from the Universe (the WOW for 2.14.16)

I have so many thoughts about our new WOW, let’s just jump right into it.  And please forgive my momentary bursts into song.

It was just that kind of day:

Seriously gang, we’ve gotten the word RISK THREE TIMES since I started pulling a word of the week!

I have to say, too, that I always put the cards back in the bag sort of strategically (around the edges) because truthfully, I like getting NEW words.

So we make plans and God laughs.

And the universe is nudging.

I remember back in the 70’s I was hugely into roller skating. Every Saturday my Dad would drop me off for my beginner lesson followed by a “free skate” matinee.  After the matinee an intermediate-level class was scheduled (They jumped!  And spun!) that I LONGED to go to.  My best friend, Chrissy Johnson was in that class, and on this particular Saturday I was staying through her super-cool kids class so I could go home with her for a sleepover that night.

I sat in one of the benches in the perimeter just WISHING I could be in the class with her.

After a few minutes passed, I got the brilliant idea that if the teachers could only see how Dorothy Hamill-ish I was (on wheels, not blades) they would surely stop everything, roll over to me and invite me to join in.

While those in the rink were practicing their turns and leaps, I began trying to do the same outside of the railing.  I even had the hand movements down, flailing my arms in what I thought were artistic and inspired ways.

Nothing.

So I did a few jumps (a bit loudly) to show I wasn’t afraid of being airborne.

Nada.

I positioned myself right in front of the windowed booth where the “DJ” and management were stationed and did a thrilling demonstration of an arched-back stop, directly blocking their entire view and ending with a head toss and blinding smile in their direction.

All that was missing was a “ta-da!” and wild applause.

As I waited for the inevitable “Where have you BEEN all our lives?” instead it was announced over the loudspeaker that if you were not a student in the intermediate class to please be seated as the perimeter was not intended for performances, which were distracting to the REAL skaters.

Okay, they didn’t say it exactly like that, but I got the point.

By now, how many of you are saying to yourself, “Where the heck is she going with this story?”

Well, I’ll tell ya.

It has occurred to me that much of my life I have been waiting to be DISCOVERED.  Maybe you have, too.

Surely if we perform well enough, some benevolent soul will see what the world has been missing and give us a platform (or rink…or a stage with spotlights..or a raise…or permission to move…or a  – well, fill in the blank for whatever you’ve been longing for).

What has struck me is that this is a very passive (aggressive), but weak approach to getting what you want out of life.

I don’t want OTHER people to hold the power for my destiny.  Why should my sense of happiness and fulfillment be contingent on someone other than me believing in me?!

Instead of the theatrics or exhausting performances (which never got me much, how about you?) perhaps this RISK word is saying, “Um, why don’t YOU just go for what you want out of life?” Or (shockingly) just ask for it!

We fear putting ourselves out there because of the chance of rejection.  But hearing the word no, last time I checked, wasn’t a fatal blow.

Had that nine-year-old girl risked it and just ASKED if she could participate in the class, who knows, they might have let me!

Or, they might have said no because of a very good reason.

Instead, my takeaway was that I just wasn’t good enough.  Because in my little girl mind, had I been good enough they would have made an exception for me.

My 52-year old self knows how ridiculous that sounds. But if I transpose that experience into the  present-day, I consider that some of my takeaways in life have been based on faulty premises; premises born of dancing around my desires because I was too afraid to claim them for my own and head squarely in their direction.

Even with this blogging venture, there has been this little part of me that has thought, “Maybe if Elizabeth Gilbert or Oprah would somehow see and like something I’ve written and share it with their respective 5 billion followers, I can…”

…I can what?

Hmmm…good question!  After a moment’s fear about the answer, here goes:

I can fulfill my dream of encouraging people full-time, writing a book, speaking around the country about life lessons, helping people give themselves a break, make them laugh and in the process bring some joy into their lives.

Yep.  That’s my dream. But I can’t pin my hopes on Liz or Oprah (though hey, ladies, if you’re out there…) riding in on a white Mercedes to make my dreams come true.

Here’s one thing I believe – our dreams are planted in our hearts from the time we are born. They are Divine.  They were never deposited in our hearts to be a thorn or to frustrate us through life.

Your dreams, my dreams – they were meant to bloom.

So I say to all of us this week, don’t abdicate your dreams. Let’s not dance around our life’s vision.

Oh!  And for some of you, please give yourselves permission to HAVE a dream…to want something. Whether it is your health, a husband, a new car or an artistic outlet…let it breathe this week.

Take the risk of admitting what you want. And with risk as our nudging WOW, maybe even ask for it. 

One reader at a time, one day at a time, I’m practicing what I’m preaching.

And I’m cheering you on all the way.

xoxoxox

Brenda

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