Tag Archives: anxiety

The Power to Choose a Happy New Path

In 2019, I want happy to be my default feeling.

And happy feelings are always preceded by happy thoughts.

Why – especially at this time of year – do we milk the drama that is so readily available from sad songs (Blue Christmas, anyone?) or the lack of Christmas cards or presents under the tree?

Sadness, loneliness, depression, anxiety, fear…I spent way too many holidays (and every other days) letting these negative emotions dig a groove in my soul. Filling in those grooves with a new pattern of happy thoughts, positive feelings, good memories and believing the best about people (including myself) has been my mission in 2018.

Paving over the potholes in our soul takes effort, but it makes the road ahead less bumpy.

We have the power to not let our pasts dictate our futures. Let’s stop expending energy on what went wrong before and instead start charting a new course, built on a foundation of loving ourselves MORE.

One of my favorite teachers, Esther Hicks, talks about when she first started using a GPS to navigate road trips. They were on their way and her husband, Jerry, said, “You know…we’re going in the wrong direction.”
Esther said, “That’s not possible! I know I put everything in the GPS perfectly. Let’s go back to where we started and figure out where it went wrong.”

Jerry listened and gently replied, “Or we could just start going the right way starting from where we are.”

Oh! That makes sense.

Don’t spend time as this year ends bemoaning where you got off track or how far away you may be from where you want to be.

Start, right here, right now on the new path.

The happy path.

The path you deserve.

It’s a choice, and the power is OURS.

Final thoughts on power and the new Word of the Weeks (which is actually a Word for the Year) are right here:

https://youtu.be/fMtfXZVsKqk

Happy and merry thoughts and lots of love are coming your way. Thanks for taking the journey with me this year!

Love,
Brenda

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You Can’t Make Me Feel Bad

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned in life is that you can’t make me feel bad.

You can’t make me feel inferior, rejected, unworthy, afraid, or anxious.

No, can’t even make me feel lonely, unattractive, ridiculous, stupid or out of touch.

You can’t make me feel…ANYTHING.

I  am (and you are) the gatekeeper to such feelings.

Now, when someone says, “Gee, you look a bit pudgy these days.  One too many donuts?” it wants to MAKE me feel bad.

Or when the voice in my head says, “Sheesh, you look every bit your age in that photo, Brenda” it WANTS to make me feel bad.

It knocks at the door of my soul and says, “Hey!  Here’s a familiar bad feeling.  Can I come in and sit for a spell?”

Because it is a familiar voice, there’s a temptation to acquiesce; to just let it in and steal the next few hours (or days) of joyful living.

But I (and you) don’t have to LET it escalate.

Stopping a bad thought before it ever takes root or gains momentum is a key to walking in STRENGTH (our Word of the Weeks).

This shifts full responsibility for how we feel onto US.  Yes, other people can be entirely crappy, but why assign them so much power?

Ah, the beautiful shift from giving a @#$%& what other people think of us to standing firm in who we know ourselves to be is powerful.

And freeing.

And fun!

Feeling GOOD is critically important.  It is a sign that I am linked up to pure, positive energy (God, Source, the Divine).

Feeling bad?

The devil didn’t make you do it.

YOU did it, but entertaining words and thoughts that should have been kicked to the curb.

Now did I just make you feel GUILTY???

Ha!  That was a trick question!

I can’t make you feel anything.

Now, when I tell you you’re beautiful and amazing and talented and smart, let it lift your heart.  Enjoy the encouragement that comes from those who love you.  That’s the icing – but YOU’RE the cake.

More on STRENGTH and the new WOW, coming right up!

 

WOW – such an appropriate word to follow STRENGTH!

Don’t fall for the lie that you can’t handle what is on your plate.  You can handle it, eat it, enjoy it, and throw that plate against the wall in triumph!

xooxoxox

Love,

Brenda

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I Vant to Be Alone! (and the New WOW)

Did you ever want to run away and just be alone?

It’s no one’s fault (although I sometimes try to place blame), but every now and again I have this urge to pack a bag, disappear, and not be heard from for about a month.

In my fantasies, my place of escape is a little apartment over top of a restaurant or other storefront above the cobbled streets of Sorrento, Italy.  No one would know me and I could do my favorite thing – wander – with no expectations or obligations to fulfill.  Deadlines, be gone! Projects, phooey!

Imagine the thrill of no guilt for falling short, running late; no need to procrastinate and no one clamoring for my attention.  

(Yes, Shasta – I’m talking about YOU.  And your Daddy.)

Aaaaahhh, the beautiful respite of PEACE (our Word of the Week) and quiet.

I do like my own company. And I don’t usually annoy myself.

There’s a reason why those old “Calgon, take me away…” commercials resonated with an entire generation of women.

Still, I know in my heart of hearts that true peace is not circumstantial – and you don’t have to sequester yourself to enjoy it.

The culprits of my unease this past week could all be tied to ruminating…obsessing…overthinking – and trying to control things (and people) beyond my control.

As the captain of my ship, only I could “right” it.

It didn’t happen instantaneously.  It started with soul-sucking depression.

Then I remembered:  Anxiety in the heart causes depression.  I did a little digging and found this, “Aha!”:

Yes, that is my familiar flaw – falling into the performance trap.  Wanting everyone to love me and approve of me.

Can you relate?

It was like having a spiritual cold.  All I wanted to do was stay in bed and eat carbohydrates.  And on a week where PEACE should win!

The good news is, I am no longer comfortable sustaining soul-ish lows.  Formerly my comfort zone, I kicked that way of life to the curb many years ago.

I simply refuse to waste this life being anything other than full of enthusiasm and expectancy.

So I made a decision, which didn’t miraculously change the way I felt.

I followed up on that decision with actions and simply kept doing what I knew to do to jump start my heart and get me back to peace and joy: Exercise. Evicting negative thoughts. Talking to wise and spiritual people. Eating healthy food. Forcing myself to smile. Counting my blessings.

Until I felt like me again.

No, peace shouldn’t be circumstantial, but unless we can run away to Sorrento and script other peoples’ responses to us, the circumstances sometimes do rob us of that peaceful, easy feeling.

That’s normal.

But thank God, my new normal isn’t STAYING there.

As my heart’s love tank slowly begins to re-fill, I’m looking forward to the new Word of the Week, too!:

Well there we go!

Permission to get our hopes up!

Have a beautiful week, everyone – full of EXPECTING good things.

xoxoxoxo

Brenda

 

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Discord, the Full Moon and the New Word of the Week!

I really think I have issues with the moon.

The full moon, that is.

I can be having a great ‘ole week, and next thing you know, I’m grumpy, overly sensitive, fearful, insecure, can’t sleep and want to throw all of my good intentions for 2016 out the window. Sounds like PMS, doesn’t’ it?

This syndrome is also accompanied by stark realizations that everyone else is thinner, more talented, has their act together, walks their dogs and never screams at their significant others.

It’s not good.  I should be able to stay in bed with the sheets up over my head until it’s over, shouldn’t I?

You’re not buying it either, are you?

So while I was trying to avoid the emotional puddles of external dramas (as mentioned in this week’s video), I was also trying to navigate the discord in my own soul.

I’m reminded of the scripture, “Anxiety in the heart causes depression (and the consumption of McDonald’s french fries), but a good word makes it glad.”

(I added the french fries part.)

But the good word came from my friend, Renee, who was patiently listening to my rant via e-mail.  It saved me from thinking I was (as she has taught me to say in Yiddish), “meshuganah” (strange, eccentric, irresponsible, crazy).

“Could it be the full moon?” she asked sweetly.

The moon!  An answer!  A reason for my moodiness.  Something to hang my hat on that doesn’t make me MORE crazy!

And that’s how a good word turned a bad day around.

Sometimes you may not be able to change the circumstances, but if you can at least understand what they ARE, it aids your sanity.  (It did for me, anyway.)

More musings on harmony and the new WOW!:

So INSPIRATION it is!

What inspires YOU?

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